digitalized: (Misc ♪ Choking)
[personal profile] digitalized
On the topic of LJ, they're trying to salvage things by giving vague promises again. Not exactly very promising, but what can I do. The future (broken down here) looks bleak.

Rereading Lord of the Rings lately, and I dreamed about owning the one ring last night. I went all MINE, ALL MINE and was panicking and running around obsessing over hiding the ring. There was also a Gollum-like creature running after me, so basically I was Gollum 2 hiding from Gollum 1.5. I think my subconscious is telling me that I wouldn't last one second under the ring's power.

I can never give conscious book reports, mostly because I'm usually not thinking about anything at all. But here's a stream of thoughts just because I can:

Me, age 13: war! more war! language I don't understand, but it sounds epic so it probably is! I love Frodo. and Sam, but Frodo's more angsty so I love him more. still not sure why Gimli and Legolas are in this. good vs evil! I probably shouldn't, but I really want to laugh at Saruman.

Me, age 21: food. hobbits make me hungry dammit. oh god I'm too lazy to read this I can't read English. what are the elves smokinnnnnnng. Frodoooooo. wait why did I not notice how awesome Éowyn is? so many English words. dead Frodo. wait no, vampire spider Frodo. Tolkien fans are going to kill me. can I just read about Frodo sleeping? asdfghfghk Bronwe athan Harthad...*slips into fangirl mode* (and dammit, Saruman isn't as funny as I remembered.)

Yeah, I am not a scholar, either at age 13 or 21. I can safely say I might have gotten worse over the years.

As for J-pop, lots of things happened, but I don't care enough to write about any of it now. I still care, about certain groups and people especially, but I haven't been feeling like ranting about anything. That's strange for me, at least.

Lacking enthusiasm for everything lately. Thinking about graduation hurts my brain. I really have no solid plan, beyond depending on other people. Most days I think the only reason I haven't strayed from this career is because I can't think of anything else I might want to do. I bring nothing to this world and probably shouldn't be here at all, but I'm stubborn enough to stay here and take up all your resources and not feel guilty about it.

Bleh, I didn't mean to end on such a depressing tone. I'm not usually that melodramatic, I swear!


digitalized: lost in the world (Default)

May 2012

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